So, not too long ago, I celebrated a birthday.  Normally, I’m a bit shy about my birthday and generally don’t like to talk about it, but I just felt so inclined to share with ya’ll why this was what I view as my best birthday ever.  Full disclosure here: I’m an optimist and generally love my birthday every year.  It doesn’t need to be fancy: just a nice day with Rick and the kids on my birthday is fine with me.  But this birthday was different.  Why?

Well, for one, we’re more in debt than we’ve ever been in our lives.  This obviously equates to more stress, so it might not make any sense that this was a greater-than-ever birthday.  So how can I possibly count this as my greatest yet birthday?  I’ll tell you:

1.  We’ve got a  plan in place.  Gone are the days where we float willy-nilly in and out of debt, wondering if we’re going to make our money last till the end of the month.  We’ve got a budget, and a plan, not only for getting out of debt, but for what we want to do with our financial lives in the long-term, so that we can live more carefree in our regular lives in the long-term, and today.

2.  We’ve got a new perspective.  Living the last six months on a super-strict budget has given me, and all of us, a new appreciation for the basics in life.  I am more grateful than ever that we always have food to eat and a warm place to live, even if it’s not necessarily my dream menu plan or dream home.  Getting back to basics, I guess, has given me an appreciation for what’s truly important in life, and it’s not working to satisfy my “immediate gratification” desires.  In fact, my first thought for celebrating my birthday was a nice steak dinner out at a halfway decent restaurant.  But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I’d have a much better time with my family if we were simply together at home, with no other noise, distractions or strangers to take away from the experience.

So Rick, who we lovingly refer to as “The Grillmeister”, grilled the kids and himself some burgers, me a fabulous porterhouse steak (from the 1/4 side of beef we got in the spring at $3.50 a pound – SCORE!), served with a baked potato and steamed broccoli, and he and the kids made me a homemade chocolate cake and we bought some Oreo Cookie ice cream.  It was absolutely fabulous, and it cost us all of about $15!

3.  The real me.  Living on a back to basics, getting-out-of-debt-budget has taken some real soul-searching.  I’ve had to learn why I spent like I did in the first place, and work to heal the hurts that caused my frivolous spending.  Also, since keeping up with the Joneses’ is out of the question now, I’ve had to learn to accept me for who I am, and I’ve also had to learn who my real friends are.  These journeys were painful sometimes, but now I know that the real me is a perfectly acceptable human being, no matter what I wear or have (or don’t have, for that matter), and I am now certain of who my true friends are.

This year was the best birthday ever because of the “getting out of debt” journey we chose to walk on January 1, and because of the changes our “getting out of debt” journey forced us to make.  Aside from being debt free one day, this journey has increased our happiness in SO many ways on a personal level too.  The sacrifices we are making to get out of debt have shown us what’s truly important in life.  What a wonderful thing!

We started our journey out of debt in January of 2013, and as of today, we’re just over 6 months into our road to debt free.  It’s been quite the rollercoaster of a ride so far, but we’ve also learned and grown in ways we never imagined.

Let me ask you a question:  Are you in a boatload of debt and considering changing your lifestyle to free yourself of that debt burden?

If so, there are some things you need to know.  It won’t always be an easy journey, especially if you are choosing, like we did, to get extreme about getting rid of the debt.  And I feel it’s only fair to give you a bit of advanced warning about some of the things you may encounter when you make this life-changing decision to free yourself and your family from the debt that’s weighing on your shoulders.

What can you expect?

1.  Erratic emotions.  This is the time, before you begin your journey, to start getting your emotions under control.  Once you begin your journey to debt free, you’ll likely feel all kinds of different emotions.  Some days, you’ll feel like you can conquer the world.  Other days, the days when the reality of your debt situation smacks you in the face, you’ll feel like you’re being crushed by your mountain of debt, and that you’ll never get free.

Days will come when you simply want to give up because it’s too difficult and it’s taking too long.  And other days you’ll be searching the streets for pennies because you’re so jacked up on the high of eliminating the debt.

It’s very important when dealing with these feelings that you either learn to talk logically and objectively with yourself about the fickleness of emotions, or have a good friend who will do it for you.  Take it day by day, and have weapons in place to combat your discouragement on the days you feel overwhelmed.  And when you’re having your good days, use them to your advantage: collect aluminum cans by the roadside, check the thrift stores for hidden treasures, or do whatever else you can do to catapult your goals.

2.  A change in your friendships.  When we started this blog and shared the truth about our situation, the gossip started to spread, even though we thought we were being anonymous.  Some people lifted us up and are supporting us on our journey to this day, others turned their noses up at us, whether out of fear or pride, I don’t know.  Did this bother us?  Maybe just a bit.  But when my husband and I sat down and talked about it, we realized that the “friends” who’d pridefully abandoned us were mostly people we knew we couldn’t fully trust to begin with, so no love lost there, and probably “good riddance” instead.

And on the other side of the coin, not only have some of our friendships been strengthened by revealing our debt and our plan to get out of it, we’ve also made some new, really great friends who are cheering us on to victory.

Whether you do it anonymously or not, f you truly commit to changing your lifestyle in order to get out of debt, people are going to get suspicious that you’ve stopped going out to eat, joining them on costly outings or skipping this activity or that.  And it’s likely that people will find out what your situation is whether you want them to or not.  Be prepared to strengthen yourself to handle their reactions.

3.  Some rocky roads.  I remember when we first started our plan to get out of debt, things were pretty smooth sailing at first.  But then the usual life problems kicked in: unexpected expenses, such as car repairs, medical bills, and other things that happen that can tempt you to throw the debt payoff plan by the wayside.  But just remember that if you stick to the plan, the time will come when those unexpected expenses will no longer hold you hostage, because you’ve got no debt and a healthy emergency fund.

After nearly six months of living super frugally, and learning to conquer the various happenings that work to get us off of our debt-slaying track, I can honestly say that we’re SO glad we’re on this road.  We’ve got a long ways to go yet, but both my husband and I know that when we get there, it will have been worth all of the trouble.  🙂

I know, I know.  After my April rant about how we were going to buckle down on spending even more after realizing that our debt is an emergency, here we are completely blowing our May entertainment budget.  I swear to you: we are not idiots, or self-centered people who just can’t get control of our spending. Read more

We’ve been a bit out of the loop this week on the blogging scene, as we’ve been hard at work on our hobby farm.  The place we purchased last October has two pastures out front.  When we moved in, one was fairly horse-ready, aside from a fencing issue, and the other was completely uninhabitable for grazing livestock.  It’s important to rotate your horses between at least 2 pastures, so we knew that we had to get Pasture 2 ready this spring, and we knew it was going to be some work. Read more

Are you considering starting the journey to debt free for yourself?  If so, I think it’s imperative that you should go for it.  There’s never been a more crucial time as to the importance of financial security.  The reasons to free yourself from the debt that’s weighing you down like cement shoes is as numerous as the sand on the seashore.  But let’s talk today about some of the more critical (in my humble opinion) reasons why you really should start on the road to debt free today.

Read more

I often find people who question why we go to the extreme budget cuts we do, and live the lifestyle we live, in order to better our situation.  For many, they just don’t find it worth the several years of extreme frugality that we’re “subjecting” ourselves to in order to reduce/eliminate our debt.

Don’t misunderstand: I can totally see where they’re coming from.  I too wonder some days why on earth we’re tormenting ourselves.  Especially when I look at the fact that we’re only at the beginning of what may be a very, very long time of counting pennies and eating ramen noodles.  Given our colossal amount of debt, we’re not just talking about a year or two of this type of  frugality. Read more